Poop Jokes & Honey Buns

The poop joke is a staple of any comic. I just control f'd my joke document; I found the word "poop" three times.

1. A joke about eating brownies...that ends with me hating my friends for feeding me...not brownies.

2. Poop Face: A person who, if for some reason they got a speck of poop on their face, would not immediately wipe it off. See Also: Fergie.

3. Adam Sandler impression.

Apparently as my conference comes to a close, the next one to take our spot is the 85th annual NWTF convention.

National Wild Turkey Federation

I assumed this was a retreat for wild turkeys, representing the weekend on the calendar that is the furthest date from the terrors of Thanksgiving. <<--Please don't fact check that Feb is farthest from November]

But apparently, this is thousands of wild turkey...hunters. My favorite of all the hunters.

I just wish they could extract the stuffing without killing the turkey.

I have seen a lot of comedians in the last 4 days, but the NWTF provided me with my healthiest and heartiest of laughs. There was one man, I will go out on a limb and say he's from the south, who was wearing an interesting shirt. At first, seemingly normal...until you realize that 1/3 of the shirt is camo, while the other 2/3 is an ordinary button down.

I recognize the relevance of camo to a hunter, but what possible situations could arise that would make having just the right side of your shirt be camouflaged. Is it easier to sneak up on a turkey sideways?

Is it the hunter's shirt version of the mullet?...business on the left, hunting party on the right.

But I think we discovered the real reason behind this soon to catch on fashion. We saw a second person wearing a partial camo shirt!

Its clearly a turkey hunter's version of a friendship bracelet.

One guy gets camo on the left, one on the right...and one lucky individual gets a camo strip right down the torso. BFFLWWKMTLTCTTSOBTT!

Best friends for life while we kill mother turkeys, leaving the children turkeys to starve or become turkey thieves.

Its a brotherhood.


Home tomorrow: GOODNIGHT